व्यक्तित्व वह कोमल स्फटिक प्रासाद-सा,
प्रासाद में जीना
व जीने की अकेली सीढ़ियाँ
चढ़ना बहुत मुश्किल रहा।
वे भाव-संगत तर्क-संगत
कार्य सामंजस्य-योजित
समीकरणों के गणित की सीढ़ियाँ
हम छोड़ दें उसके लिए।
उस भाव तर्क व कार्य-सामंजस्य-योजन-
शोध में
सब पण्डितों, सब चिन्तकों के पास
वह गुरू प्राप्त करने के लिए
भटका!!
किन्तु युग बदला व आया कीर्ति-व्यवसायी
…लाभकारी कार्य में से धन,
व धन में से हृदय-मन,
और, धन-अभिभूत अन्तःकरण में से
सत्य की झाईं
निरन्तर चिलचिलाती थी।
आत्मचेतस् किन्तु इस
व्यक्तित्व में थी प्राणमय अनबन…
विश्वचेतस् बे-बनाव!!
महत्ता के चरण में था
विषादाकुल मन!
मेरा उसी से उन दिनों होता मिलन यदि
तो व्यथा उसकी स्वयं जीकर
बताता मैं उसे उसका स्वयं का मूल्य
उसकी महत्ता!
व उस महत्ता का
हम सरीखों के लिए उपयोग,
उस आन्तरिकता का बताता मैं महत्व!!
पिस गया वह भीतरी
औ’ बाहरी दो कठिन पाटों बीच,
ऐसी ट्रेजिडी है नीच!!
बावड़ी में वह स्वयं
पागल प्रतीकों में निरन्तर कह रहा
वह कोठरी में किस तरह
अपना गणित करता रहा
औ’ मर गया…
वह सघन झाड़ी के कँटीले
तम-विवर में
मरे पक्षी-सा
विदा ही हो गया
वह ज्योति अनजानी सदा को सो गयी
यह क्यों हुआ!
क्यों यह हुआ!!
मैं ब्रह्मराक्षस का सजल-उर शिष्य
होना चाहता
जिससे कि उसका वह अधूरा कार्य,
उसकी वेदना का स्रोत
संगत पूर्ण निष्कर्षों तलक
पहुँचा सकूँ।
Translation:
The persona is like a fragile, crystalline house
In which lies a staircase, and on it lonely stairs
The climb was quite difficult
Let us leave those stairs of
Exceptional emotions and exceptional logic
And harmoniously structured
mathematical propositions to him
In search of those emotions, rationales and harmonies
He wandered amongst scholars and philosophers
To find a teacher.
But the age changed and arrived then the capitalist
… from profitable ventures came wealth
And from wealth the mind,
And from the depths of this wealth addled mind
The shadow of truth
Would forever scream.
Within his soul, however
This persona held a lively discord
A global conflict!
At the feet of greatness
A melancholic heart.
If I had met it in those days
I would have lived his sufferings myself
And told him of his own importance,
his greatness.
And the utility of his greatness
For the likes of us
I would tell him of the importance
Of his psyche.
Ground he was between
Two hard slabs, from within and without -
Such despicable tragedy.
In the well, he himself
Talks endlessly in these deranged symbols
About how he kept at his mathematics
In a cell, and died
In the thorny dark clearing
Of a dense forest
Like a dead bird, he departed
That unknown flame fell asleep forever
Why did this happen?
Why did it?
I want to be a disciple
Of this Brahmarakshas
Like the water against his chest
So that I can take,
His incomplete work,
The source of his pain,
To its utter conclusion
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